Babysitter from Hell or not?
by LM1991
Summary: Finally and surprisingly Professor Membrane realises his children are lonely and that he's busy thanks to the interference of one nosy reporter. He hires a babysitter; this is of course a receipt for funny things to happen.
1. Chapter 1

**IZ: BABYSITTER FROM HELL OR NOT**

**Title: **IZ: Babysitter from Hell or not

**Summary:** Finally (and surprisingly) Professor Membrane realises his children are lonely and that he's busy. Conveniently enough a young woman has just moved into town, expecting to live in a nice house. She realises she's conned when the 'nice house' is a cardboard box. When she goes looking for a roof over her head she's hired by the professor as a babysitter.

**Pairings: **none

**Disclaimer:** Jhonen Vasquez is the genius who created Invader Zim, not me.

**A/N: **_This is the beginning of my first IZ fanfic. Exciting, yes? We all know that prof Membrane would NEVER hire a babysitter because he's a jerk with no feelings, but let's forget that for my plot's convenience.  
>Oh, and OF COURSE there's an OC.<em>

_Lis_

_(By the way, you have NO IDEA how long it took me to come up with a beginning for this. I wanted it to follow canon, and whoa, that's difficult.)_

**CHAPTER 1**

Professor Membrane. The man who had invented so much mostly useless stuff that was fussed over like it was all useful.

If there had been some actual smart people around (not counting the more or less brilliant Dib and the insanely scary Gaz), they would have noticed that the man loved attention and being on TV more than anything, even more than his own children (the same more or less brilliant Dib and the insanely scary Gaz, how convenient!).

They would notice that the professor had, before this moment, never thought of the possibility of people being concerned about the fact the he left his two children alone most of the time.

The interference of only one person would change that.

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Light coming from every angle. Cameras everywhere. Interviewers shouting for the attention of professor Membrane, who had once again invented something.

This happened quite a lot and both the interviewers and the professor were used to a sort of plan of action for this whole shouting game.

First professor Membrane would explain what his new invention was and how it worked. The last part was to make people clueless; nobody could understand the professor's big words, but they all pretended they could.

Then the interviewers would ask questions, interrupting each other and causing a loud blur of sounds that could have been associated with a herd of elephants being thrown into walls.

Most would follow this plan of action. But today, a new interviewer had found his way to the city the professor lived in.

Blake, his name was. He was Australian, had brown hair and a beard (and a face, a body and clothes, and his camera as well) and was very, very, very nosy. This was needed if you wanted to be a successful reporter in Australia and other countries, but in other cities like these, it would only get you stared at, and probably not in a good way. But Blake did not know that because he was new here.

Blake did his homework, and had found out a lot in a short space of time. One of these things was that the professor had two young children. Blake liked children, because they were small and fuzzy – wait, that were the woodland creatures he liked, excuse me – anyway, he liked children because they were playful and always spoke their minds. Or they would when they had the chance.

ANYWAY. He also heard that these children had been left home alone almost their whole life. That did not go down well with Blake. And the interview was a perfect place to voice his opinion of the situation.

When the interview had been going on for about an hour, Blake scraped his courage together (which was quite a lot, so it took up a long time to get it together, okay!), coughed a little and fought his way to the front of the interviewers.

"Professor!" he said loudly into his microphone, straining to be heard. Strangely enough, his voice seemed to echo above the other interviewers'. Thank the Plot God it did. "Care to explain why you're leaving your children alone at home all day?"

Professor Membrane turned to the one brave (or stupid) enough to ask that question and seemed to size the man up. Slowly, very slowly, as if someone had turned the whole thing to slow-motion, the professor's eyes met Blake's.

"I am a very busy man." The professor's voice was slow and calm. "All for SCIENCE." And then it wasn't anymore. He turned to the audience, that had been forgotten through the whole professor-talking-to-interviewers thing, but was needed now. "Honestly, how much attention do children need anyway?" he chuckled, obviously expecting the audience to laugh with him.

Before anyone could start laughing, Blake interrupted with a shocked, "Are you telling me you don't know that children need a lot of love and hugs, sir?"

"What?"

Blake spluttered a little. "Please tell me you have at least hired a nanny!"

Professor Membrane frowned. "Why would I do that?"

"…FOR SHAME!" reporter Blake cried. "Professor Membrane, if you do not hire a nanny in the next twenty-four hours I, as a child-loving person, would like to write a very… bad… review about you, but that would probably get me fired. Unfortunately. Find it in the goodness of your heart, the part that says you actually care for your children and love them like a father should – where is that angel choir and that spotlight coming from?"

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_A/N: Chapter 1. Whoo. Finally. Took me some time to get it right. Anyway! This is my first IZ fanfic, and I am Dutch, so please be nice to me when you leave a review. C'mon, you know you want to. _


	2. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER 2**

Night found professor Membrane still working. And then I don't mean that someone named Night found the professor, but that the professor was still working at night. The workaholic.

His eyes were invisible through his goggles and his mouth was covered by his collar, but it was obvious he was a man with trouble on his big, big mind. He stood slightly hunched over his work table and paused once in a while to sigh, grumble, wipe away some sweat, or mumble something about science.

You would expect the trouble to be some sort of invention that didn't quite work. You would be wrong.

The most important thing in the whole world to the famous professor Membrane was his reputation as the smartest man on Earth. Nothing, absolutely nothing could best that. (All right, smartest man of the _multiverse _would we nice, too.) But he wasn't about to let some newbie journalist ruin it for him!

He was going to find a…

He frowned. What was that word the reporter used again? A… nanny? That was it.

He was going to find a nanny for his offspring!

...Right after he finished this invention.

* * *

><p><em>AN: Yes, I know I haven't written in a while. Was too busy doing other stuff – plus a major Writer's Block. Bad excuse, maybe, but another short chapter is the result._


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